December 20 2001
Thursday
Have you ever been so completely taken by surprise that you are suddenly struck
dumb?
Well it happened to me this
morning. I'd completely forgotten about the penis
enlarger, and by the time I remembered and went round to the
garden where I'd ditched it the bloody thing had gone!
When I knocked on the door who should answer but one of the women
teachers from our school!
I said "Have you seen my penis.....
and at that moment my
jaw dropped open when I saw who it was. By the time I'd recovered my speech
she
had slapped me hard round the face and had gone back indoors, to be replaced by
her irate husband, who demanded to know what
the hell I meant by asking his wife if she wanted a look at my penis. I explained to
him that I'd been about to follow 'penis' with 'enlarger', and that it was my
penis
enlarger I was asking his wife if she'd seen, because I'd had to
ditch it in their garden the
day before due to unforseen circumstances. He asked me what it looked
like and I told him, and he said yes he had seen it but he'd thought
it was some sort of bicycle pump
someone had thrown away, and he'd chucked it in his wheely bin.
Of course, wouldn't you know it, the bin men had collected the bins in the meantime,
so the penis enlarger is now
enlarging the council tip a bit. And I'm in deep shit. |
